Revenge of the Bacon

Here's a text message I never ever thought I would send.  Especially to another mother, thank god for her sense of humor.

FYI your son just tried to choke to death on bacon.  He is alive and well  a little shaken and there are many pig revenge jokes flying around the table, no sympathy here.

The boys are all sitting down for breakfast and I have two extras here.  One of them stands up and points to his throat, then coughs a little and says, "I'm choking"  I move him toward the sink as he is gagging too and I'd rather he throw up somewhere easy to clean up.  I know from training that as long as he is coughing and talking he has air.  I'm not that cold hearted.  I start pounding the poor guys back and he is hacking up the bacon in my sink and after the bacon was dislodged I hear from the table(they had to make sure he was going to live before they started cracking jokes, so kind of them):

Poor guy, he was minding his own business when that bacon decided to jump down his throat for killing all the pigs on mine craft.

Yeah!  Revenge of the pigs!(I keep having revenge of the nerds running through my mind except with little pigs in glasses)

I'm not eating bacon any more those pigs are mean.

So I made toast and I now fear that the poor kid will have a revenge of the bacon fear for the rest of his life.  Well, I guess that's something to talk about in therapy later in life.