Sunday, August 17, 2014

Theater Fun!

The boys had another successful show at theater. They have so much fun hanging out with the kids at theater and being in the shows I am very grateful to all those that have kept the local children s theater alive. My sweet cousin came to watch the last show and sent her mother a text thanking her for attending all the shows she put on as a child. (You would think this wasn't Broadway!) After the shows were all finished I had a few habits I would like to have handled before the next show for my middle child but after I had a conversation with one of the directors I will be grateful that some habits are behind us...For now.

Director: Corbin came up to me and pointed to the television and said "Did you see that? I am on T.V.!" It was really cute.

Me: He's so silly! He really has come a long way!

D: Yeah he doesn't grab my boobs anymore that's really an improvement!

I lost it. Yes my middle man had a thing for grabbing particular women on their chests. Not all women, just the extra special ones....GA!!!!!! Fortunately Diego has broken him of this habit.

Me: Now if we could get him to stop grabbing himself on stage that would be good.

D: But then what would we have to entertain us?

Me: With my three boys? I'm sure there will be something!

D: True.

Do not play with swords when you are supposed to be in bed!!!

I put my children to bed at a decent hour most nights. I assume like I'm sure countless other parents are sure when they put their children to bed that they go to bed or at least lay there and listen to their iPods, read books, or whine for more water.

This morning I discovered that my oldest child has not been doing any of these things. No. He has been practicing his karate. Specifically his new sword kata.

Z: Oh yeah mom...Look.

He shows me his thumb, it has a rather decent slash through it.

Me: Okay, how did you manage that one?

Z: I was practicing my sword kata last night and forgot to remove my thumb before I took it out of its sheath.

Me: That thing has never been sharpened. 

Z: Yeah if it had been I would have lost my whole thumb. 

Me: Sigh, okay so what did you do after you tried to cut your thumb off?

Z: Went in the kitchen, cleaned my battle wound, and put some super glue on it.

Me: Great, so maybe the lesson here is this, DO NOT practice sword kata's when you are tired, supposed to be in bed, and not paying attention.

Z: Yeah, that sounds like a good idea. 

I sent this story to my friend who reminded me "Dull swords/knives are always more dangerous than sharp ones. Don't you know that?

Me: How about unsharpened blunt swords?

"With your kids I'd believe almost anything."

Me: Yup. That's sad.

"I prefer the term entertaining."

Thursday, August 14, 2014


Driving the kids to one of their many activities the other morning, low and behold a squirrel ran out in front my car. At the same time the suicidal squirrel was running my children were bickering about some Pokemon nonsense and I was done with the bickering so I did what any good mother hoping to inspire a distraction in her children would do. I yelled SQUIRREL!!!!!!

Corbin: Where?!?!? I don't see it! (Ah sweet success!)

From the sweet mouth of my baby boy comes a very matter of the fact tone and statement: Under the car. Dead.

Me: No, it got away.

C: It dodged the car?

Me: Yup!

C: He has excellent squirrel skills!

Under his breath the teenager mumbles..."No points for you mom."

I think my dark side genetics are strong in the oldest and youngest children.....My dear friend said "It was bound to be strong with one of them."